Questions for Couples

Good questions help couples stay curious about each other. These banks are organized by use case — pick what fits your moment.

20 Daily Check-In Questions

Keep these short and honest. A check-in is a signal, not a presentation.

Good for Sunday evenings or a standing check-in. Go deeper than the daily quick check.

1.What was the best moment between us this week?
2.What was the hardest moment — and how did we handle it?
3.Did anything go unsaid that needs to be said?
4.How did our time together feel this week — enough, not enough, or something else?
5.What's one thing I could do differently next week that would help you?
6.What's one thing you'd like more of in our relationship right now?
7.Was there a moment this week when you felt particularly seen by me?
8.Was there a moment you felt particularly unseen?
9.Are we protecting enough time for each other?
10.What's one thing you want us to do together before the month ends?
11.How are you feeling about our communication lately?
12.Is there anything building up that we should address before it gets bigger?
13.What's something you're grateful for about our relationship right now?
14.What's one habit you'd like us to build or protect?
15.How are you doing physically — sleep, energy, health?
16.What's something you're anxious about that I might be able to help with?
17.Did anything happen this week that changed how you see me (for better or worse)?
18.What's one thing that has been competing with us getting real time together?
19.How are you feeling about us in the bigger picture?
20.What do you need from me next week?

Skip small talk. These go somewhere.

1.If you could change one thing about how we spend our time together, what would it be?
2.What's something you've always wanted to do together that we haven't yet?
3.What's a version of our relationship five years from now that excites you?
4.When do you feel most yourself around me?
5.What's the last thing I did that surprised you?
6.What's a part of your life right now that you feel like I don't fully understand?
7.What are you currently most proud of — in yourself or in us?
8.Is there anything about our relationship you wish we talked about more?
9.What's something you've noticed changing in yourself lately?
10.What's a habit or ritual you'd love for us to start?
11.What's something I do that makes you feel most loved?
12.What's something you need that you've been reluctant to ask for?
13.What's a part of your past you haven't fully shared with me?
14.If we had a completely free weekend, what would you want it to look like?
15.What's something about us that makes you feel proud?

Use these after a stretch of low connection — when you know you've been ships in the night.

1.How are you doing — more than the usual answer?
2.What have you been carrying lately that I haven't fully known about?
3.What's been missing between us during this stretch?
4.Is there anything that happened recently that you haven't had the chance to share?
5.How are you feeling about us after this busy period?
6.What would feel like a real reset for you right now?
7.Is there anything from the last few weeks that left a residue — good or bad?
8.What would you most like to do together this week?
9.What's something I can do to help you feel less alone right now?
10.Do you feel like we've been prioritizing each other enough?
11.What would make this next week feel more connected?
12.Is there anything you've been wanting to bring up but were waiting for the right time?
13.How are you feeling about your own life — separate from us?
14.What's something you're really looking forward to in the next few months?
15.What do you most need from me right now?

Put these questions to use.

CupidCalendar turns check-in questions into a shared daily habit.